How it looks on the outside isn't how it is on the inside

I know that we have been blogging about our progress on this diet, but I felt compelled to talk about having an invisible illness.  As my sister and I were talking the other night and she was telling me how hard it is when someone asks her if she is feeling any better she feels it so much easier to just say yes than try to explain how completely exhausted she is even though she has been resting.  She may show a bit of that on the outside but I am sure, as I know first hand, that it doesn't appear on the outside so it is very hard for people to grasp.  I am certainly not blaming anyone I just know that sometimes you just want to stay in your own little hole so as not to have explain how you are feeling.  I was telling her that it has become very hard for me to commit to any one's invitation to do something as I am never quite sure how I will feel.  No you don't want this to rule your life, but you do have to learn that if you push you will pay the consequences so you have to decide whether it is something that you will be able to recover from quickly or will this set you back for days.  With the summer heat, which is enemy number 1 for me, this is important for me to weigh. 

Anyway, I wanted to say all this because it has become so important for me to have a group of people who understand where I am and what I am going through so that I can share and not be judged.  Friends and family do not mean too, but a lot of times they say things that can really hurt you when really you just want someone to listen and hold your hand.  I am blessed with a group of women that I am able to share all of these things with and they with me.  We cry together, laugh together, and hold each other close, praying for complete healing all the while as we know that our God is in control of our lives.  God has also blessed me with a sister who understands and we are able to share our good days and bad with each other.  Also knowing that God has a purpose for us and that through these struggles we will be able to help others.

If anyone reading this that suffers from a chronic illness or chronic pain please don't suffer alone.  There are groups out there that are positive.  www.restministries.org is a wonderful website.  On there you will find a tab for Hopekeepers.  If you will  click on this and put your state or zip code in it will let you know if there is a group in your area.  Maybe you will be called to start your own group, this will bless you many times over.

God is good and He endures forever!  Do not loose hope reach out!

Love and Blessings
Keri

Homemade Pork Tamale vs. Sweet Potato with Pecans

First of all I would like everyone to know that eating garbanzo beans and cherries in the same meal is not a good idea.  Definitely had major stomach blow up.  I am happy to report when eaten at different times there does not seem to be a problem:-)

This morning mom called to tell me that Maggie had just delivered fresh homemade pork tamales to her and that she was having one for breakfast.  It made the sweet potato I was microwaving less than appealing.  But at least I know that not eating the tamale prevents me from having a migraine.  Something that corn tends to do to me:-(  Actually the sweet potato drizzled with a little walnut oil and topped with toasted chopped pecans was pretty good.

Last night I had Pad Thai noodles with sauteed swiss chard and scallops.  Yummy.  The Pad Thai noodles are made from rice and I really like the texture when cooked.  I think you would really like them and they can be found in the Asian section of the grocery store.

Today I am going to try some recipes out of the Yeast Connection Cookbook.  I will let you know how they turn out.

I went to bed completely exhausted last night and woke up almost as tired.  This is really getting old!  I am going to check out the National MS Society website for the discussion groups as you suggested.

I have decided to steal Ahnnah's saying, "I am fine, except for my condition":-)

Flaxseed Wrap and Cherries

After two or three weeks I am starting to get bored with the things I have been eating.  I need to come up with a couple of new items.  Today I tried making something called a Flaxseed Wrap.  The ingredients are easy to obtain.  It tasted pretty good, but like most gluten free breads, tortillas, etc it did not stay together very well.  Cheese definitely would have helped:-)

Since today we can add fruit back into our diet my fruit of choice is cherries.  I love cherries.  I bought two or three pounds a week ago when they were on sale.  I don't plan on eating all of them, my plan is to dry the majority of them for future use.  I think I will go pit a few to eat now that I think of it.

Flaxseed Wrap
Healthy Wheat Belly-Shrinking Recipes

3 tbsp ground flaxseeds
1/4 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp onion powder
1/4 tsp paprika
Pinch of sea salt or celery salt
1 tbsp coconut oil, melted, plus more for greasing the pans
1 tbsp water (you can use assorted vegetable juices to alter the flavor if you wish)
1 large egg

Mix together the ground flaxseeds, baking powder, onion powder, paprika and salt in a small bowl.  Stir in the 1 tablespoon coconut oil.  Beat in the egg and 1 tablespoon water until blended.

Grease a microwave-safe glass or plastic pie plate with coconut oil.  Pour in the batter and spread evenly over the bottom.  Microwave on high for 2 or 3 minutes until cooked.  Let cool about 5 minutes.

To remove, lift up an edge with a spatula.  If it sticks, use a pancake turner to gently loosen from the pan.  Flip the wrap over and top with desired ingredients.

Emailed a MS life coach today, hopefully I will hear back from her.  It is somebody I read about in a  MSFocus magazine.  If she does not contact me back I am contacting the National MS Society, I need to get some perspective on where I go next.  Will keep you posted.

Love,
Pam

P.S.  I just figured out today how to title my posts:-)

My Evil Twin

Today my evil twin over took my body and I lost the battle over a tortilla and a bag of Peanut M&M's:). I know you might ask why a tortilla? Well I made tacos for my men last night and just ate the meat and lettuce and some homemade salsa, but tonight when I got home from work I just wanted to eat all of it wrapped up in a yummy homemade tortilla and I couldn't fight the urge as my hormones are ragging right now! It tasted so good! Then I took Clay to basketball practice and on the way we stopped and bought a couple big waters and the M&M's were right there calling to my evil twin, "Buy me I am so yummy"! I ate the whole bag and now I have a belly ache. I know I should be stronger than that, but I said I would be truthful through this whole journey, so I am telling you the truth.   I also must add the rest of my day I ate really well, as that does count!

That was yesterday and today I am back on track.  I tried something different for breakfast today.  I cooked some old fashion oatmeal and put a tablespoon of almond butter in it and stirred it all up.  It was really yummy and stuck with me much longer than just oatmeal or just a rice cake with almond butter on it.  I did steal the idea from a friend who is a nutritionist and had suggested the idea with peanut butter. 

I can tell you that being gluten free is definitely a key for me.  I know that is what has caused a lot of my stomach problems.  One thing I have had to be careful with on this diet is to eat enough protein and to keep my potassium up.  I am looking forward to my two weeks with no fruit to be up so that I can at least have 1 piece of fruit a day.  I really like to have a banana in the morning with my breakfast, or some blueberries in my oatmeal.

The other thing that I know is that being able to control my environment and rest when needed has made a huge difference!  Praise God.  I am so hopeful for you sister that this will too make a difference for you.  It took awhile and I also I had to keep reminding myself that the reason I feel so much better is because I have been taking it easy.  The mind wants to say otherwise, like you should be doing more since you feel better!  Lies.  When you have an illness that no one can see and even you know it but when you look in the mirror you can't see it, well you tend to be much harder on yourself. 

I pray that this journey that we are on will help us to grow closer to God and only rely on what He wants from us not what others expect from us. 

Blessings to you,
Keri

P.S.
Pam maybe you should try a bag of Peanut Butter M&M's sure made me feel better;)  Love ya

Limitations

Something to hold on to. In my devotions this morning I read the following scripture and prayer. It really spoke to me as a person with an invisible illness who is struggling with what direction to go with my life. Is this constant unrelenting fatigue going to be with me from now on and if so what does that mean as far as work, my ministry, my life? Anyway, I hope the following blesses you as much as it did me this morning.

 Help me, O Lord my God! Save me according to your steadfast love. Psalm 109:26

 We were afflicted in every way - disputes without and fear within. But God, who consoles the downcast, consoled us. 2 Corinthians 7:5-6

 As I think about my day, dear Heavenly Father, I could be discouraged by my limitations. I'm thankful that your Spirit buoys me up with your gracious purpose and power to accomplish all things. Help me to see my disappointments from the perspective of your vast mercy and love. I cast myself upon you because I know you care. Amen!

Relief

Relief! The massage and acupuncture did help me feel better yesterday. Of course I should have come straight home, but instead I spent a very pleasant couple of hours with my sweet sister-in-Christ Vivian. We went out to brunch and I had an omelet with hamburger, green chilis and tomatoes. It was pretty tasty, even without the cheese:-) The recipe I mentioned yesterday was not a keeper, mom did not even like it. Beets can be very earthy and these were:-( I also had bar-b-qued chicken and summer squash. I may try adding a little more lemon juice today before I toss it completely. We have had much needed rain the past few days. The only down side is that I have an evaporative cooler, which only makes things muggier. The upside, my garden is so happy!

Migraine, Massage, and Acupuncture

 Yesterday was a roller coaster of anxiety and then a major migraine. We finally had a really good thunderstorm and I am wondering if that is what brought on the migraine. The kind that makes you wish you could throw up or cut your head off. Today I have a hangover. Thankfully I had scheduled a massage and an acupuncture treatment for today as part of the healing process while I am off. I pray that it helps. I finally was able to make contact with Dr. Susan. She says the issues I am having with my menstrual cycle indicate I am detoxing. I guess maybe things are working, I am just getting to go through the yukky stuff before I get the pleasant results:-) At least I hope that is what is happening. I reminded her I was following the candida diet in my follow-up email to her. It will be interesting to see what she says about the impact that the diet maybe having on how I am feeling. I tried a new recipe yesterday with the last of my beets. I have not had a chance to really try it. If it is a keeper I will post tomorrow.